I must have had a great time last night.. I woke up with coconut oil all over my glasses
curled up in a ball on my bed listening to my "cuddle with a boy" playlist. prettty high.
id pay someone 5 dollars to tell me whos house im at right now. comfy couch though
The little penguins are speaking with a hispanic accent. I dont know how to feel about it. Geographically speaking, this cant be possibly. This isnt cool.
i just remembered last night waiting for you to pick me up wearing my bra on my head to protect me from the rain
She said "don't make this weird" and then proceeded to sniff me.
Just had my ass outlined on a bar top with permanent marker and then they carved the imprint into the wood with a knife. I'm famous in the country!
Haha...we lost by one cup to a guy w shitty facial hair. What makes me most mad abt the loss is that I could grow a better beard on my vag.
You will never truly trust yourself until you have shaved your armpits, legs, and vagina in the dark.
My throw up tasted like pumpkin, fall is right around the corner.
Yeah he drove 30 minutes at 3 AM to come fuck me in my neighbors treehouse
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
I just had a flashback to me puking and you telling me it was okay because my boobs still looked awesome.
I love how fuckboys immediately become cultured when I tell them I’m an artist.
How bad is it that I can say that this isn't the first time a married man, who is in the military, has tried to make me his mistress?
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