So pretty much, I was trying to piece last night together and remembered a point where I was pointing to you heart then touching your face. I'm not sure that I ever translated that to "I like your personality better than your looks" but that's what I meant
so high i just made my own version of grilled cheese using toast and spray cheese
here comes the puke
He did the "not my house dance." Apparently it involves spreading cereal on the floor and then grinding into the carpet in bare feet while singing "not my house" over and over and dancing.
You rode him down the last flight of stairs like a human sled.
On that note I give you a 10 for sticking the landing and staying on the whole ride.
I DO NOT KNOW WHO SHE IS, WE HAVE NO MORE FRUIT, SHE CAN'T STAY HERE.
My addiction to golf is getting out of hand....I just caught myself swinging my dick like a putter while peeing.
Ran into my neighbor that's always crying. I wonder if she's like; "I ran into my neighbor who's always playing with her vibrator?"
I am his drunk Jesus. I will love him from afar because he's my little lamb
I mean I love some drunk compliments, but he just wasn't up to my low standards.
I'm bringing home frosties. I need to talk about butt stuff.
leads to pukin, then cryin, then 24hr masturbatin binge, then cryin again and finally a combination of all 3
I don't know how to explain to you that you tried to recreate the bit from the Dana Carvey show where a guy dressed as Bill Clinton breastfeeds a bunch of puppies
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
It's like a donut of clothes around a pair of heels. Like they were transported to another dimension naked.
Fuck your bullshit loser kid and his gluten allergy.
Randomize
