If I go to jail what happens to my debt?
You dont have to pay it.
I'm going to jail.
can we please move this conversation out of my vagina?
We had one of those mutual "I know your on a dating website, I won't tell if you won't" glances.
he stopped midthrust to put on his sex playlist and the first song was 'can you feel the love tonight'
where do you find these guys?
Yes, he made a MIX CD for our booty call...
we're decorating our christmas cookies with birth control. so pretty.
I think my sunburn makes my ass look bigger
I think I broke my hip playing drunk ping pong
I feel like we should apologize to the light saber. We were REALLY inappropriate with it last night.
Some guy I've never met before just came outside and started rolling a blunt on our fence and passed it around to all six of us. At eight in the morning. Today's gonna be weird.
I should probably drink beer instead of rum today so I don't end up naked in my living room while I still have guest.
so in addition to the two guys I slept with last night, and the third that I turned down this morning, a fourth has appeared. best Valentine's Day ever.
How many times have you told me to call 911 this week?
Lol twice
She was calling him Bob Saget and asking him to buy her shots....how do you think the night went?
I feel like he doesn't realize we're offering him a threeway with sisters and I don't understand how that's possible.
Maybe we should bring mom next time.
Randomize
