I love seeing the creepers that friend request me outside of facebook. its like seeing a unicorn in the middle of campus.
its like accelerated beer pong for children.....we train champions young
Aqua-barf. When you are about to puke in the toilet but pass out face first instead...and then puke. WITH YOUR FACE IN THE BOWL. There is no escaping the puke ring you have on your face. I know first hand.
The stripper was waving you to the stage, not up on the stage. That's why you got choked out.
Well I just walked into a wedding reception and im currently eating a cannoli in the men's room while pissing
Grandma can hear your bong from the living room, please be more quiet. Love mom.
At some point, it turned less into sparring and more into tough guy dry humping.
From the same High Brittany who brought you such thoughts as, "Fuck, am I wearing shoes?" Comes High Brittany on a date! Stay tuned. This will be interesting.
That freshman guy that keeps trying to hook up with me just saved someone's life ... Should I reconsider?
We decided to make playlists for each other. Do you know any songs that say "sorry I'm not as hot as your prostitute ex?"
Trying to figure out if the guy I'm with right now is the same guy I met spring break
Oh duude it is the guy from spring break! Awk.
Why does everyone always assume I'm fucking their boyfriends?
You are fucking her boyfriend.
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
I dont know if hes kidding... but hes drunk and said hes going to shave his balls. Alert your emt friends
I'm just trying to figure out the reason why humans wear socks....
Randomize
