so evidently yelling "gay" everytime your bf tells you how he feels is cause for breakup. news to me
I just googled "buy xanax online". What is wrong with my life?
Since when do you wear a bracelet?
Not a bracelet. Half a pair of handcuffs
I mean. If you don't have time I understand, but my dick doesn't.
Sometimes I stop and laugh and think "and these are my actual life choices".
Went to bed with a bowl of spaghetti O's on my chest, I make my own breakfast in bed. New level of laziness
come home. i made deep-fried hotdogs; don't let me die alone.
im watching blue is the warmest color at the music box and this dude is literally masturbating 3 feet in front of me
Blacked-in to me, shirtless, giving myself finger guns in the mirror and rapping "stacks in the club stacks stacks in the club."
I'm really going to need you to stop yelling Campari.
NO ITS THAT IM A SEXUAL DEVIANT AND CANT FILTER MYSELF
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
Okay so as of now, we may either be coming for one night, two nights, or not at all this weekend. It depends on Laura's toe and if I get my period. Will explain later
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
