I think the phrase "baptist college" should be an oxymoron.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
My life is a requiem composed in the key of fuck.
All I know is that if a letter starts with "I'm aware you jerked off in the bathroom last night," I don't want to finish reading it.
i just ran into my boss at the liquor store. we didnt exchange words, just nodded in mutual understanding.
Oh I forgot to tell u. I hit someone with my car in the RiteAid parking lot. More like a nudge.
His ankle bracelet went off in the middle of sex. That makes a girl reevaluate her life...
I fake pass out to avoid hookups sometimes. Last night I fake slept on my bathroom floor for like 2 hours before the guy left.
Between the hair pulling and the choking its its more like combat than sex
Sorry I have an "Operation Iraqi Freedom" fantasy
I feel like this is going to result in some sort of tearing in my vagina.
Thats a chance were just gonna have to take
Tornado booty call.. dedication
I was about to take him home and fuck his brains out but then the police came and arrested him for the stolen credit card he had been buying me drinks with all night...
...Just hit my fuck buddy with my car.
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
Just had an emotional break through with the dog. That high.
Randomize
