so... another position just opened up(704) Oh really?(704) Is it John's?(704) Or did you find a new way to take a penis?
we were dressed as cave people and he kept telling everybody i was so easy a caveman could do it.
Relationship's official after skype sex--college kid at his finest.
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
you were so high that you made a 14 page PowerPoint on why Santa would beat Peter pan in a fight.
and I must say, you were very persuasive
thank god my boss can't smell the tequila on my breathe over the phone.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
She yanked on my limp dick and I yelped, to which she slurred something about starting it like a lawn mower
Ah that wonderful moment when you realise the bookmark you were using in a book you lent your mum is actually a receipt from a strip club
wrestling a boy for fruit? sounds suspiciously like foreplay...
I only remember singing the Captain Planet theme song on our way to the bars.
we had to follow your trail of clothes to find you.......
Did you come home, throw out a ton of shoes, then leave again?
That is exactly what I did.
I tried making my own red bull with crushed up caffeine pills, bubbley water and flintstones chewable vitamins. The ER doctor sead I'm lucky to be alive.
Randomize