I found a pair of size 15 female undies on my floor?? is that big?
Short Circuit remake moving forward, David Carradine dead by his own hand. Come home soon, society deteriorating rapidly. Nation's capitol likely not safe.
maybe all of them together would equal one normal sized dick.
His pubic hair was longer than his dick
i have my graded calc test (94%) sitting on my empty case of beer next to my desk. this is me winning at college.
I just realized that my phone was set to Brazilian time...what the fuck happened last night
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
I may not have eyeballs after all the drunk naked people having sex outside.
Tell him to dress up like Shaggy and kidnap him then bring him to me. We can pretend. Imaagination.
At this point, just throw that mattresses away. Or bronze it and display it as a testament to your shame. either is good.
I have to date her we need a place to stay for tailgating
Nope, had to pee on the side got violated by tall grass. Then someone came around the corner and I had to stop mid pee to dive into the car.. Pants down
Only thig bad about that muscular chick from the gym is she liked it so rough I had to bust out a few wrestling moves from highschool
Even blacked out me knows not to sleep with socks on
Long story short, I found someone who takes me seriously when I say I have a Shakespeare kink.
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