Mr ***** is in bed with his super hot wife giving her 18 inches of pleasure
My wife says its no good to have oral sex during pregnancy. So i guess pregnancy is like regular life.
My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
just watched a girl laugh at her own fingers... it's not even noon...
My roommate just did the walk of shame in last nights corset back to our room to find her dad there. THATS why i go to school out of state.
Wine smoothie.... Not as good as I thought it would be
being a part time student has turned me into a full time alcoholic.
i was on the fence about his sexual orientation until he referred to his marlboro loghts as "carrie bradshaws"
FYI I'm about to upload a vid of you to facebook of you screaming "SNACK ATTACK" and throwing cheetos at everyone playing pong...
High me just had to pick the lock on my sisters room because I locked my vodka in there. I love vacation.
I was afraid someone would drug test my pants so you set them on fire.
There comes a point, as I lay on the floor of the work disabled toilets contemplating catching 10 minutes sleep between chunders, that I wonder if its really worth it
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
Make sure you wash your hands. That seagull you threw was very sick.
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
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