I just ate 3 burrito supremes and a crunchwrap...can't feel feet...I think I have diabetes
well thats why i like him. because he makes you happy. on the other hand i think he masturbates too much while texting you.
I am SOOO high
tell me about your high
HUGE THUMBTACKS
High as balls & about to be tanning. Helloooo 15 minute vacay.
It's a good thing i didn't end up pregnant...i would have had to figure out his last name.
Dude, somewhere around here makes 4loko slushies. I just decided coming home isn't so bad.
you dipped you banana in queso last night.
Fuck you, jack daniels. I feel like satan laid an egg in my brain.
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
True that.. I am going to ride a gold plated unicorn across a field of cocaine and coach purses when I graduate.
That was beautiful.
In complete seriousness I think I am the highest person on earth
Whatever dude, just dont tell her your first impression was she looked like your cousin. no judgement here. just sayin.
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
I just sent a Slack that autocorrected tomorrow to gonorrhoea. Please note that Slack autocorrect isn’t very good.
Randomize
