who do you think you are?
someone who doesn't ask that question
The bubbles in my bathtub are singing to me in german....
There aren't nearly as many guys masturbating on chatroulette as i was led to believe...i feel cheated
He is going overseas for 8 months, not only was that blowjob a going away present, but i was supporting the troops
How was the bike ride?
Nope. High in the basement. Fruit cups.
I think Memorial Day also marks the beginning of "Bikini Profile Picture" season.
I noticed when you had too much when you were yelling "HOE-HAVE-A-SEAT" to his cat.
Found her in the closet eating mayo out of the jar with a knife
No I'm done finals, but I'm not coming home until these hickeys are gone.
On my way to the DMV to get arrested
So I had a crappy evening so the fat girl in me says eat and cry and watch something sad. The cool girl in me says don't eat go run. So I'm watching family guy and doing crunches w a pickle in my mouth
Gross
AN ACTUAL PICKLE
Well I just found the most comfortable way to pass out on my toilet if I ever have to.
Its a good thing to know for upcoming events.
no, I didn't go in the end. Too hungover and hot, plus Star Wars is on so obviously I'm having a naked day.
She asked the bartender for "7 shots of something fruity" and long story short the bartender punched me in the face. Chivalry is stupid.
She is getting high and watching the Hobbit. I want her life.
So she is basically watching her own life story: short people traveling to strange places.
Randomize
