I'm so glad you managed to take a picture of your foreskin before you broke my camera.
This girl looks like a mixture of kathy griffin and bill walton. i havent decided if that is a good thing.
His facebook status is an owl city song. I'm so glad i didn't end up fucking him.
There is a semi-attractive guy at the door who's looking for you. Says he met you on Chatroulette. Start explaining NOW.
his mom and i are swapping prescript pills..totally mother in law material.
The "puke-towel" started to grow something...
Step 1: drink. 2: drink more. 3: go for it. 4a: success. 4b: drink more. 5. drink. 6. go for other girls. 7. drink more. Sound good?
Not sure. We'll pass out on that bridge when we stumble to it.
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
don't let me wipe my vag with a dirty leaf outside of mcdonalds ever again.
be ready to rage tomorrow. like naked ranch dressing rage
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
I hope you have irresponsible drunk insurance because you're about to pay a deductible
New drinking game idea: Take a shot for every republican you see on facebook bitching about the ruling.
Can you pay somone's bail with a credit card or just cash? I feel like you would know this.
Randomize
