but it happened after you broke up with me and before we made up.
oh and i feel obligated to inform you that there will be no sexin' because it's 'lady time' for me. so this ain't a booty call.
She's coming to town, taking me to a Suns Game, wants Anal, and knows we're not going to date, I imagine this is what heaven is like
You couldve had sex with 2 drunk chicks on an alligator slide.
As it turns out, drunk trust falling that guy at the top of the waterslide didn't really work out for anyone..
I don't remember. I think I elluded to the fact that I would buy him a dildo for his birthday.
GOING OUT OF BUSINESS: we're having a foreclosure party tonight...We'll also be raffling off a washer/dryer, microwave and a white tiger head.
So I'm seriously debating forwarding these sexts to his horse faced new gf including the ones that say he still loves me... but I still need his check to clear... decisions decisions
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Mango bong: no go. Guava bong: sweet flaming buddha it was delicious. I shall teach you the ways of tropical fruit trees.
I wish we knew morse code and could knock to each other through the wall
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
what the fuck happened to the tacos
No instead we fucked in the elevator.. it was wrong on so many levels..
How tall was the building? Maybe it was only wrong on some of them
He ate me out while I stood on his bed drinking a Rainier.
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