quick i need to know how implid consent works for golf carts
too late i think im gettin a gcui
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
I am drinking ovaltine with peppermint schnapps. My childhood could have been so much better.
Also we decided you're the person whose going to die at my bachelor party...do the math you're the most logical choice
Don't judge me. If you're going to fall off a bed you might as well do it gracefully into a bag full of beer.
I came home to the cats covered in paint and he was asleep in the tub with a firefighters hat on.
Our kitchen sink faucet is leaking, so I set a pitcher under it to catch water for Kool-Aid tomorrow rather than turn on the faucet. The environment owes me.
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Just saw a huge group of people walk by in there in their underwear. Too stoned for this.
Moral of the story is go have sex with a foreigner and report back to me.
Come in your red robin gear. If you smell like French fries we can make love.
Our group of friends now have more broken bones than reasonable excuses for why they're broken.
Yeah I ended up covered in the mud by the end, in a lady bug golf cart that was blasting jazz music with a dead phone
I tried to help you up but you said "let me dance it off"
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
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