Last night I saw a drag queen take a shot of Red Hot that was soaked into a tampon. I fucking love my life!
You need to find a way to go down on me and lick my toes at the same time
I'll google it
But it was well worth it to see a man fly through the air in a beaver costume...
How do you have time to get laid so much in law school?
I like to set goals for myself. for example, he was my first libertarian
I had to throw a towel over the bottles cuz it hurts to look at them
Totally just projectile vomited while ridind a bicycle.
no dont worry i changed into my costume in the hospital bathroom
Hostess is going out of business we'll never survive the apocalypse
I have a rage boner right now. An actual erection brought on by the amount of sheer hatred I have towards nationwide.
You threw a shot glass at the bartender and still managed to convince him to let us drink more. You are my hero.
Do the molecules within bourbon change when mixed with a cola to form a superior liquid treat?
Like, she can be the shepard of the gays. Delivering him unto homosexuality.
So stoned that I pressed the unlock button on my car keys to walk into my bedroom...
i now understand why vodka
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Randomize
