she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
We had to use the stains on Phil's shirt to try to piece together what happened last night.
He was the drug dealer that jumped out of his car to get my number
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
But youre all cute and shit. Woo that cunt. And by cunt i mean strong independent woman
You're about to fuck a guy with a sweatshirt tied around his waist like a mensurating 13 year old. Get your priorities straight, you're graduating tomorrow.
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
We should drive around in your Jeep on snow days and get stoned while we help random strangers stuck in the snow. So much good karma.
Not genetic. He's drunk and texted me a dick pic. Not genetic. Thank God!
My boss followed me on Twitter. Excuse me while I delete 90% of my tweets
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
It was fine. Until I accidentally shit on his floor.
So now I have had sex with 2 people my son graduated high school with.
Thank you, BTW, for defiling my bed. Glad it was done well.
You think that was bad? One time my parents found my sister half naked on top of the four runner in the garage. She makes me look like the good child.
Randomize
