when i came out to my mom, it was over brunch. i was eating a banana. not exactly my smartest breakfast choice.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
In case any of you were wondering, kyle is alive. He also intends to do the same thing tommorow night and the night after.Goodnight everyone
im not even sure if i fucked her just woke up in her closet.
He's either jacking off or listening to Kanye West.
Pushiiing vjews 4 ma daz caik
Lyk hr kuds 4
I took an adderall. This is weird. My eyes are really wide open and I am really good at staring. I've written on 9 peoples walls and updated my status. I am getting shit DONE!
Drowning in science and also vodka. Hope you're having fun.
What happened after I vommed in your shirt that I was wearing and threw it out the window on the highway?
Sent him a snap chat of him eating me out so he can relive the moment.
He said we were over, wrote my name on the condom he left in my car last night and said he'd always keep it in case I came back. It was kind of romantic
I just started the bonfire using a tampon. Who knew they could have multiple uses?
We took vodka shots. You kept saying it was the key to your heart.
When she says 'Polish hangover cure' she just means more vodka. Don't do it.
Wait what do you mean I BOUGHT A FUCKING HORSE LAST NIGHT?!?!
Randomize
