im at the bar and i misjudged a fart...go home or ride the night out?Never mind, the bouncer made the decision for me...be home soon
You must have had one hell of a time explaining to that girl why aladin soundtrack was playing on repeat in your room when you got back
i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
He just compared himself to a majestic butterfly in regards to the lack of girlfriends. i don't even know what to say.
As I sit on the toilet at 4 am I realize tonight could have gone a lot better
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
Just got your message from Saturday. Shove all the kittens down your pants? Really?
I was emotionally compromised.
You could be a whistle.. And just ask bitches if they want to blow you all night
The man was doing everything in his power to get away from his wife, including go into the gay club.
What guy invites over a booty call, gets all naked and then when the real fun begins and a condom is needed, claims to not have one? And wears socks THE entire time?
You threw up in your own shoe then wore it home
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
Let go out that Thursday night!
Yess sounds good, I have to go turn myself in the next day because what happened last Friday.
got laid for being an eagle scout again. 4 more and ill have all my merit badges.
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