He IMed me 5 times, before my homepage even loaded. This is not gonna work out for me
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
We all have a cross to bear. Yours just happens to be attracting gay men.
Its funny how you denied every part of the text except " you hate fat ppl"
They glued all of the ceiling tiles shut.
oh my god. you caused complete remodeling to a college campus that you don't even go to
My bruised ribs were so worth that win in beer pong
We attempted to microwave fifteen corndogs in the microwave and may have ruined it. Also there were fake mustaches on all of his appliances...he said he doesn't like drunk me.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
i found out she really is a mensa member
so she was the smartest passed out on the floor hair encrusted in vomit girl at the party
please, i've had weekends with less dignity than this.
When you were bringing him upstairs I told him to bring you on down to pound town. you're welcome.
Day drinking! Today! (tomorrow too!) Our place! Whenever you get off work! Ready go!
Someone put pennies in the toilet. This isn't a fucking wishing well
She dated an Australian guy or some dude with an accent. Normal guys don't stand a chance.
CHALLENGE ACCEPTED.
Cockblock successful. That's for pouring nacho cheese on my flatscreen, asshole.
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