So how Liz Lemon is this? I bring a boy home, we get in bed, and I realize there's a lean pocket wrapper in the sheets.
just next time i won't let coke make me think I'm superman and drink a shit ton.
we have a love-hate relationship...we love having sex but hate waking up next to eachother
I'm sorry but all I really read was "my nipples will get hard."
Just crossed the line from casual pregrame to public intoxication. Shotgunning in a bus shelter.
We found her. She's owling on the sink in the bathroom.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
Would it be inappropriate to trade Christmas cookies for sex?
I'm just checking to make sure you don't want to go to the farmers market... This is an assumption based on the fact that you were slapped with a sandwich last night and you remained unconscious.
He's like all my past boyfriends wrapped up into one fuck up. It's enjoyable to watch.
So when I walked out, everyone was chanting ONE OF US, someone draped a lei over my head, and then she grabbed my ass and dragged me back into the bedroom. I'd say it was a pretty good night to lose my virginity.
this relationship shit is hard. like i'd like to be able to watch veep without him trying to dry hump me. also im drunk and its 11 am so
You're officially the most high maintenance man I've ever had inside me.
In case you were wondering I realized something last night, Rick James was correct. Cocaine is a hell of a drug.
this dude is way too smart. he just explained to me the different scientific components of drugs while we smoked. i said i loved icecream.
Randomize
