how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I think i peed on brittanys purse
I would dunk an oreo in her breast milk
the doormen always congratulate him in spanish as he walks me downstairs in the morning
She went to the bathroom before i broke up with her so i changed all 2500 of her songs on her computer to "I'm a cheating whore"
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I mean we've tried to get high on nutmeg, we clearly dont know the definition of "too far"
Tequila bombs in champagne seemed like a good idea at the time.
Duuuude - Drag Queen Bingo wasn't supposed to end like thissss
Do you have any booze?
Well I have 60 feet of bubble wrap and a bottle of wine...but I'm saving that for a special girl...
The gay is strong with you! You're more concerned about my outfit than my safety.
So much Jack, so little girl.
If it makes u feel any better my dick feels pretty tender dude
Hey, thanks for helping me this morning
Always a pleasure to feed you bread as your body lay crumpled on the floor.
One can only be this extremely wet once a year and I feel like I'm bitch slapping god by not using this gift he has bestowed on me.
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