If we're like this now and women reach their sexual peak in their 30's, I can't even fathom what our futures hold.
oh my god. the driver of our party bus just said "no drugs unless you're sharin," my confidence in him is not high at the moment
Oh, I forgot to ask if u have any idea what happened to the back of my ear and if u were present when I almost fell off the roof...
Well... this vagina won't eat itself
I just puked in my non fat yogurt... But it's non fat in hopes that someone wants to eat my vagina
As usual, I had to fight him for his car keys. Though this time he made it to the valet garage. All the Hispanic attendants gathered around and watched. Felt like I was in a cock fight.
The fact that she put a frat guy in check tells me I did some good raising my little sister. Time to see if she does keg stands.
Hey.. Here's a thought for the evening. There's only two more sleeps until I fuck you so hard my back teeth will convulse.. Here's too Tuesday! Woohooooo
I'm sorry for gagging during our first time having sex
I was drunk
Please answer
I have better things to do with my life than be faithful.
The bartender has no bra and is giving out free shots. Call mom I'm getting married.
He started praying immediately after we hooked up, condom on and everything.
Seriously my new passion in life is the girth of his penis
I would like to reiterate that I went to give lessons and ended up having a three way instead
Never make a coconut bikini from a real coconut.
I smell like old thai food.
it was the most awkward makeout ever. it was record breaking really
...i feel like you have a lot of those.
Randomize
