i nerd-gasmd. plain and simple.
You guys sftrill at mcdondalds?!!!!
Yes.
fuckin bring me a cheseburgeria
billy ray cyrus is narrating a show on the history channel. my iq cant decide whether to go up or down.
My psychiatrist is "consulting" others. I am high-achieving nuts.
we got 12 live crabs and then we got really stoned and know we're playing with the crabs. thats nom watermellon nom. now i'm plaing with a crap whos such a gentleman
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
I believe I won the Golden Vodka Bottle of sadness last night for crying while being party boyed.
I was taking a bath while he walked in, sat down on the toilet, and said "its like a baby, I can see it crowning."
Wrestling for my wallet turned into us almost having sex in the middle of the hallway
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
No man we're leaving now. The party will probably be busted soon. O and a bitch started throwing knives around the place, like real actual knives.
Going to dump some dried Xanax powder into some Mac and cheese. Can't think of a better way to avoid tasting it.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
this is a PSA to never have sex in a bed from ikea
YOLO is a great motto until you end up with Chlamydia
Randomize
