Now it won't go down.
You've got a gift.
u know ur in oregon when the cop tells u to keep the beer cans he made u pour out so u can recycle them
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
No, we have matured. We've stopped having sex in front if his room mate.
You dislocated his arm and then bought him two shots to numb the pain while you pushed it back in
also found a pic of my head in the microwave from the other night.. hmm
I think I freaked him out last night. We got back to my place and I made chicken nuggets, chicken Alfredo, and half of one of those huge oreida hashbrown bags. And then ate all of it
Did I send you a drunk selfie with a pine tree last night?
Yeah, I mean I'll probably fuck him regardless but I'm trying to be a lady about it.
Checking my Tinder matches as I sit here in the waiting room at Planned Parenthood. I can't be stopped.
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
dude where did you go last night?
when the tequila says to run, you start running.
I have dined. Now I want to get fucked.
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
Randomize
