Your an asshole
Actually, it's "you're an asshole"
My point exactly
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
If you liked it then you shoulda put your dick in it, oh uh uh oh
I just typed my entire senior project presentation on my blackberry,
can you put a coffee maker in the dish washer? yo know what, nvm i want to be surprised
he put on The Eye of the Tiger while she was in labor.
Easy Mac is falling out of my sweatshirt as I'm walking down the street.
Sometimes he has weird facial hair...Basically he has a penis... that's what he's got going for him.
and everything will be beautiful and nothing will hurt and we will eat nachos
i'm just sitting here watching hocus pocus, eating takeout, and taking self esteem quizzes online while everyone is out partying. you tell me how my night is.
I just did the walk of shame..with a blanket and a cup that says i will out drink all you bitches. This was not how i pictured 25.
The date officially concluded on the phrase "Nosh dat vag".
he said "GREAT SCOTT" as he was cumming.
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
Fursuit judi Dench just stared directly at me for 3 solid minutes telling me that cats arent dogs and i believe her because if i dont cat jason derulo might try to have sex with me
Randomize
