You're completely useless in the revolution.
does it bother you that i swallowed like millions of your unborn children
actually, i try not to think about it
and i pooped them out
Almost accidentally stole a baby... explain later
I could feel myself puking on my feet but it was so warm i didnt even care.
Same here... Well I was planning on having some sort of deep conversation, but looking at how grim of an outlook tomorrow has on you, I'll just re-inform you that I have your pants.
im drinking italian dressing and watching dexter. its 230am. lets never drink on sundays again.
I believe its time to stop celebrating Thanksgiving. I've been drunk for over a week. If my liver doesn't give out, and I'm not pregnant I will truly have something to be thankful for.
I may or may not have just ruined a marriage. But in my defense I got all my drinks for free tonight.
What not to say at an interview: i can wrap the shit out of some food.
Well THAT'S the last time I buy beer and baby wipes in the same Walmart run ... just wanted to shout I USE THEM TO REMOVE MY MAKEUP, YOU ASSHOLES
You would be so proud at how green we're being. Re-using last night's jello shot containers.. saving the world one step at a time
I think anything that happens between 12 and 2 am is just sketchy enough to be a good idea.
I just licked wine off my own thigh. I've hit a new low.
So, I actually said the words "but face tattoos are sexy"
That 2-CB was ass.
You mean the asprin cut with pez?
Randomize