There's a hobo dancing by himself. Is anyone going to ask how he got in the house?
dude, never take two tylenol pm and smoke three bowls. i feel like i'm covered in cold ants.
never trust anyone who drives a pt cruiser.... write that down
Just got thank you sex for shoveling the driveway. I cant wait for the next blizzard
When I stretch out her lips her vagina looks like a dolphin...this birthmark is awesome
I woke up and blew hamburger out my nose. That kinda night.
I'm sorry but I have to break up with you. My wife is pregnant and can't have a girlfriend too.
You said "sustain yourself" quietly over and over as you fed joeys hamster cashews. Acid you is a trip
The weekend is off to a good start: she just got into a verbal fight with a hobo. Nearly a fist fight.
I wish you could take over my body and feel what my nipple feels like right now
I know everytime I get my paycheck I'm like "I should probably renew my gym membership" and then I just buy more alcohol
that's all we do, eat and hve sex, eat and have sex. he thinks it's bad and that we need to talk more or whatever but I'm just not seeing the problem...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
how many ponies have to be on my pajama pants to convince him im gay?
i think we need a new approach.
Whats a polite way to say 'if you havent put on a freshman 15 i would like to see you during break'?
Randomize
