I think I'm going to go home and read The Bible.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
I sharted during my first quiz and I couldn't leave, I went ahead and took the rest of the day off.
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
first off, his name is dougie. strike one.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
My parents just suggested that we tailgate the midnight christmas service. this is my gene pool.
I'm trying to make a sex playlist
record yourself crying and put it on a loop.
She licked EVERYTHING then yelled at me in Spanish. I just kept saying SI.
We weren't even through customs yet, and we got offered weed. You would love Jamaica.
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
How long until you're healed?
Physically? A week or so. Emotionally? The scars of dislocating my knee at a frat and flashing my panties to the whole crowd wi never heal.
Started mixing booze directly into the 2 liters and carrying them around. Mixing less often, and now kind of weightlifting,so double effecient.
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
