she cant drink. allergic to alcohol.
ewwww. she might as well have a dick.
I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
I would describe it as pure and unadulterated shock, mixed with horror and a touch of nausea.
being alone eating nachos and drinking from a giant munchen beermug really isnt that sad
According to the bell hop, we stumbled in about 4 and then cannon balled into the pool.
I don't think my body can handle the alcohol I want to put in it anymore.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
You know what i just remembered? I asked the 8 ball if i was gonna get kicked out this semester before any of this stuff happened and it said yes. ITS REAL.
laying on floor next to bathroom with vent on to give myself comfort and remind me that im not going deaf. what did i smoke?
He filled four shots of Everclear and walked around saying "FREE VODKA SHOTS". he is to blame.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Man, I'm real high and googling what all my favorite figure skaters from childhood are doing now.
I thought it turned out lovely. You got to see me almost naked and I got to be stoned to the point I was content with
Wtf when were you almost naked??
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
NOT PREGNANT according to the two dollar tree pregnancy tests I took in the tacobell bathroom. Come meet me at tacobell for celebratory soft tacos.
Randomize
