Oh KT! There was no tea in those Long Islands...
Im doing kagels to the beat of Christmas music... "Jingle Bells" is hard. Try it.
explain the missing patches of hair on my cat. now.
Do you think we're allowed to sign male strippers into the building with a valid id?
he just left. I blew him in my kitchen while my parents slept down the hall. Welcome back home!
But it's not about our feelings, it's about making the men we sleep with feel awful about their lives
Ice cream: Good. Fraternity: Good. Eating ice cream off a Skid Row bum's ass crack in order to get into a Fraternity: Homoerotic at best. I quit.
If I don't at least start a parade that spirals into drunken riots then I'm calling it a fail of a birthday
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
If there was a tv show called "True Life: My 58 Year Old Dad Rolls Better J's Than Me" I'd be on it.
My night can be summed up in 3 words: Vodka. Threesomes. Hospital.
He's been watching the World Cup too much because right before he came he screamed "NUT!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" for half a minute. Our landlord is not happy.
Well now you know my birthday fantasy: gangbang consisting of men wearing NPR pledge t-shirts.
I screamed "You look like a guy I've fucked!" to your brother at a party... I have some explaining to do.
tell me about the eggs
Randomize
