I got date raped at Sigma Chi last night!
Dude, you never made it to Chi last night. You fell into a tree and passed out.
Sometimes he's such a bitch I forget that he's not actually a girl. Last night I asked him if I could borrow a tampon.
He had some in his pocket. That was weird.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
We should steal a little kid and go to Chucke Cheese
the only thing i remember last nigh is talking to some chick for thirty minutes about cheese.
you know, this Evan Williams whiskey isn't so bad when it's watered down a bit and you're home by yourself on a Saturday listening to Snoop Dog alone in your apartment without pants or any plans for your future...
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
Because she seems like the type to give it up for a box of fruit rollups.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
its gotten to the point where if her hand isn't on my butt i think we're in a fight
So is it weird that I am super excited for my new captain america clit ring... Or is my crotch getting too patriotic
A lady played my boobs as if they were drums. It's been that kinda night.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
