Tip #47, don't trim the bush when you have the shakes!
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Please come fuck me. I had the worst sex of my life the other night and I need to be reminded that sex is actually enjoyable
I'm unshowered, and since I've seen this episode of say yes to the dress, I've decided to go to the store and get a frozen pizza at 10:20 am. I'm crushing life.
This is why i like single justin better. my only regret is not being present for more of his short life. may he rest in peace
We just started the day with vitamin bombs. Daily vitamin + whatever's left in your glass from last night = feel like a champion
I just can't deal with that sentence
I have way too big of a thanksgiving food baby to enjoy any of my old high school booty calls
Is it just me, or do you see your penis in that hand?
these people use weed stems as birthday cake candles. I'm never coming home
I miss using glorious as an adjective. I'm gonna start doing that again. And I'm gonna try to get cuntatrosphe in there some more, too.
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
He just snapchatted me a blank snap that said "miss our sex" Vagina game too strong
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
As a home can we vote to stab Peter?
Please stop telling my mom she doesn't have nipples when she's been drinking. You know shell show you. Forcefully.
Randomize
