We George Forman grilled some girls phone last night.
I'm about to cry with happyness at the beer that will be consumed
Do you understand how much easier life would be if fannypacks were normal
It's okay. I've dumbed down my notes over the semester because I knew I wouldn't be up to understanding things come finals.
Lets now bow our heads and think of girls with ex boyfriends who were great at fingering them. That's so sad.
You were making out with a freshman and said you wanted to back to his place. Then when you got to the door to leave you said "never mind." He sad it wasn't fair and you got all serious and told him "welcome to the real world kid."
she's an english major so her sexts are something i look forward to
You hit a new plane of existence as we all watched in awe
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
Ultimate fat girl moment: I promised him my mouth for the night if he bought me a funnel cake..
The boob job was worth every penny just to see the expression of pure joy on his face the first time he saw them.
where are my pants?
in the oven.
I'm at home, drunk, and I just called the guy I lost my virginity to and invited him to my wedding.. I've got to stop drinking by myself.
After we fucked we sat in bed and watched Charlie St. Cloud and he fed me ice cream. It was probably the most romantic thing I've ever done.
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Randomize
