when you close your eyes do you see, that mystical creature will be me.
who is this?
this kid down the hall keeps banging on his drums...i feel like i'm living in jumanji
please tell me if i'm home and in my bed
negative
come find me please
Well at one point you put icyhot on your feet because you lost your shoes and it was snowing outside.
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
What's he like?
The usual. Sarcastic, dark, full of fucked up emotional problems that result in fantastic sexual prowess.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
We can add pilot to the list of people who's lives I've changed...with my penis.
after that, he'll be sure to remember me. i'll probably forget him, but that's the way it should be.
I really want to text him and congratulate him on having a bigger penis than the guy I dumped him for, but I thought that might be awkward...
At Walgreens. I'm getting condoms and a bottle of water so that I'm not "just getting condoms". I don't think I'm fooling anyone though.
Would you go as one half of Harry and Lloyd in Tuxes to Aaron's wedding?
He came all over her clothes we have to leave
What did the sign say that bob stapled to his ass?
Just realized that my booty calls are vastly ranging in penis sizes.
Randomize
