Lonely and bored. Am I allowed to play Dance Dance Revolution by myself?
Your fb status are always so intriguing.. Often make me picture you naked
just found preset five on the shower head...pretty sure my pussy just had a panic attack
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
When I sent you a text telling you to splash water on your face, you texted me back with 'Iwehre N qyull.'
What would you do if you came home and i was in nothing but the table cloth?
pain. pain everywhere. this is why throwing yourself at concrete is a bad idea.
I'm drinking straight vodka and railing lines of adderall while writing a paper about the nature of Jesus. It's 6:50 in the morning. College.
I should've realized you were drunk when you began to point at my crotch while yelling "Funland!!!"
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
Bought pregnancy tests in bulk off amazon. Kinda feel insulted that it asked if I wanted to subscribe for regular shipments.
I finally figured out how to tighten my bra straps and I feel like a god
i just passed i guy i once let listen to me masterbate on the phone...nyc is not big enough
Godammit I caught my hair on fire taking a bong rip
You aaa... you ever forget to wipe your ass?
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