Where you are. You must stay where you are are
Where you are. You must stay where you are arewhere are youu
Where you are. You must stay where you 5eare wher are you!!
Non-Jews are for practice
wake up i wanna do it froggy style
So we were in the middle of hooking up when he stopped me. I thought he was having a moral dilemma about the whole having a girlfriend thing. But no. He got down on all fours, butt naked, and started throwing up and farting simultaneously. I took it as my cue to leave.
i almost got kicked out of the rave because i was trying to get in on some couple's makeout sessions
is it weird that i blow-dry my hair and poop at the same time?
not any weirder than you telling me this at 4 in the morning
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
I JUST HAD PHONE SEX. WHILE TAKING A BATH. FOR AN HOUR. EATING A PLATE OF BURRITOS. TOP THAT SHIT.
I found the bottle of ketchup and sobe you tried to hide in the middle of the lawn last night
He fucked me so hard I might have to go to the hospital for internal bleeding
Can I have him when you're done?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I found my hair extensions. They were in my hamper.
If you get home and there is an older woman there, its my mom. She wants to come and see the place after work. Just an FYI. Not the older sluts I bang.
Dont judge the spank bank, just be happy that you were deposited there.
why isn't there a kind of gay where i let guys give me head but they don't expect me to give it back? i could be that kind of gay
He was that good?
Randomize
