I like how you refer to peeing in the car as "super cute"
the mandatory saturday morning class for those written up by RA's turned into a gold mine...just met EVERY hot chick that parties.
you drank a bottle of vodka and then while throwing up in my toilet you kept reminding me our hs reunion was in 2 yrs and it was time to start getting thin again anyway
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
I'm not sure any amount of coworker judgement will keep me from eating oatmeal with dinosaur eggs.
I consented to having my finger branded. How was your night?
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
Right now, there's some ten year old kid getting ready to go outside and play basketball. He will soon find out his basketball hoop was no match for my car.
Swish.
That's a really terrible idea.
Awesome I'm gonna do it then, thanks for the input
We stole a Christmas tree from the student center and then decorated it with everything we stole from parties... All I have to say is Feliz Navidad!
I just smoked weed out of a tomahawk, then chased an armadillo with said tomahawk, I love my life.
Its like he got lessons from Jesus on how to use his tongue. And his dick.
Just showered and cleaned every bit of sex off of me cuz i have a feelin my stepmom has jesus powers and would be able to smell it on me
this is the 3rd time this week I've gone to the liquor store to stock up for the next 2 weeks
He ate me out in a golf cart while I watched the sunset. You are so right, golf skirts do provide amazing access.
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