Just saw the homeless asian lady making a hispanic man pull her shopping cart with a harness. I love Boston.
I'm watching CSI, they found semen in the woman's ear.
Guess she heard her killer coming
I'm starting therapy this week.. Taylor Swift music isn't cutting it for me anymore
And by the way, how is me getting head even remotely comparable to you fucking 3 guys?
I got a hennah tattoo of my room number on my arm...I love spring break in Mexico!
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
Just getting in the shower.... found a "great job" sticker stuck to my boob.
So how was your night?
Dollar Store pregnancy tests. For when you sorta wanta know.
They have marijuana tests too!
Boobs are out for the taking
Yeah and you keep saying "I know how to win America." While running away from us
Apparently calling shotgun while getting put into a police car is frowned upon
I'm in the smoking section between a transvestite molly dealer and a group of juggalos. I shouldn't be that hard to find.
I don't know. I just have an affinity for nudity when I'm drunk.
How the hell am I supposed to tell that to a group of eight year olds?! It was three in the afternoon for fucks sake!
And he claims I gave him “fuck me” eyes while he was ordering me a happy meal
Dog. I woke up between my ex boyfriend witch i'm currently fucking and his bestfriend spooning me in MY bestfriends empty powerless house still really fucked up. No one knows what happend.
Randomize
