Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
That was rough. We had a 50% puke rate and 100% still drunk rate at lunch
I just realized that my mother and I have the same favorite sex position, Guess which one!
OMG! Ew.
Lucky Dad.
Trying not to fart in the comp lab is going to take everything i've got.
Not that you went to little darlings at 3am. But that you checked in on Facebook. C'mon bro. You're better than that.
Want to come over and play therapist and then fuck all the emotion away?
i'm hungover but need to study so i had a vodka orange juice, three ibuprofen and an adderall for breakfast. what up med school
nothing out of the ordinary. you aplogized for having a spicy vagina and passed out
Yeah, last night in the parking lot was hot. I'm sure whoever has the surveillance tapes thinks so too.
WAKE THE EFF UP THE UBER DRIVER IS TRYING TO TAKE ME HOME
Drunk me has cost me a lot in cell phones...
Look at us. Planning our business meeting. Including snacks like shrooms & trail mix.
we woke up when the front wall of the house caught fire.
He deliberately gets me high because he knows I fuck better and then I make food for two. I don't know if I should feel mad or proud of him for thinking that far.
I just found my phone after looking for it since yesterday afternoon it was in the fridge.
Randomize
