Hahaha, sighhhh...I texted him to no response. It's a shame, really...I would gladly exchange my body for pizza rills.
I feel like death. And death is wearing a fleece blanket as a dress. And is seriously contemplating wearing this to go get something to eat.
Exactly how many bongs can i have before my parents figure out they really aren't vases
boy from dating site added me on facebook. i don't know if i'm ready for him to see what a drunk i am.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
He's going to be my graduation present to myself.
It's sitting in bleach right now. You will be the creepiest coolest dude in my book if you made a bracelet from my tooth.
Koalas always seemed like really high little puppy kittens to me.
I should have bailed a long time ago. I mean, he has a bible verse-a-day app next to his dick pics in his phone.
There's like a dolphin trainer convention here or something. I will parlay this trip to Vegas into riding Shamu if its the last thing I do.
We go out, we get drunk, we watch Star Wars, we pass out. What's wrong with this tradition?
I tried to feed the cat bread. I told her it was the body of Christ. That seemed to work.
You don't have a cat...
Dude no i feel my liver disintegrating
Randomize
