She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
TAKE DOWN THAT PHOTO OF ME IN THE NURSES COSTUME NOW.
She told me that she had to rub her face against me because she was part cat.
we ike ciroccccc we love patroneeeee shost shothosthsothosthostsssss veryboyddddyyyy
go home
I wish Facebook had filters like: Ivy League school, frat boy, straight, extremely wealthy, great in bed.. I would check all of them
Is it bad that I just used Smirnoff as mouthwash?
the only reason i invite her is so when the guys start to hit on her i know it's time to take their keys
Ugh. my cast still smells like fermenting hot tub water and bad decisions.
The less fucks you give, the more fucks you get. Kinda like "a penny saved is a penny earned" but with vagina.
I said to him "i can't have sex with anyone in my friend's living room" then he said "we can move the air mattress into the kitchen"
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
He got in a shopping cart outside of home depot and insisted we push him down a flight of stairs. For science.
When the theology professor asked me what touched me most about this trip to Rome, I guess "the guy from last night" wasn't the proper response.
It's official. I have spent more money on weed than on textbooks this semester.
Randomize