This kristen chick is fuckin nuts. She's pyscho. She's a trainwreck. She carries baggage. She's... Perfect.
Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
so high. i feel like my whole body is a boner
I am midnight drunk by noon
I think I just made patron unclassy I bought limes at a gas station and for salt we are using gas station packets of salt
It is 3am. I'm at a pizzeria with my 4 friends. The one to my right is throwing up on herself, the one to my left is crying hysterically by herself, the one in front of me is passed out on the table, and the other is trying to find a taxi and I'm pretty sure a guy is sticking his hand up her skirt. Tourists are taking pictures. Help me.
Last night we hooked up in nothing but out UK shirts during half time. Never say I'm not a dedicated fan again.
You spend 45 minutes trying to convince that pregnant girl you were with all night to have sex with you cause 'the worst had already happened.'
once you get past the part where you think youre gonna die, its the most amazing drug ive ever experienced.
Guess who just got caught by mall security having sex in a car in the parking lot... at noon. This chick.
We now only communicate via Xbox messages. Living together is so easy
I am in a hotel room with 10 people. John is in bed eating an industrial sized pan of mashed potatoes. I think a non insignificant number of people saw my nipples.
the next thing I knew, I was on the floor of a Tim Hortons bathroom in Canada.
can i get licensed in dentistry online like a priest
You know how last week before we left I was drinking outta that blue cup and I left it sitting across the road. Well, it hadn't moved and my family just found it, brought it inside and cleaned it. I think this cup is my soulmate.
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