I'd suck a dick for hot wings now. A metaphoric dick that is
I've been sucking dick for sushi for weeks now...hasn't worked yet :P
I was just about to go down on her when she gave herself a "smell check" and said "no, not today".
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
That was the gentlest I've ever been bitten in the face by a dog
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Just retrieve me from the bathroom floor when you're done
Hootey the Owl eats a mean pussy.
Um, OK. WTF?
The guy from the Halloween party. We finally hooked up. Went down in me for 45 mins. Came 4 times.
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Oh god I want to come home! They have an air raid siren here that alerts their neighbours across the desert it's time to come over on atvs and drink.
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
The guy I made out with the other night fed me chipotle favored funions and I thought it was true love when I was drunk.
you know you should be lucky to find the case to my dildo....that means no more random guys at the house!
i dont know how or why im in the gym right now, but theres a hot cop, a guy i hook up with, and his hot friend. this can only lead to every fantasy i ever had.
I'm drinking because I just started here and every single person I work with wants to quit and when I asked a coworker how she's doing she literally just started crying.
Randomize
