Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
So my prents justed posted "DO NOT DISTURB" on facebook and i just heard their door shut and lock...I'm leaving
The kid taped his penis down so that he wouldn't get a boner while dancing with girls. Oh these middle school man whores never cease to amaze me.
Well I'm 85-90% sure that he licked syrup off my body, but no guarantees...
It hits you later. Like when you wake up on the floor under a puzzle later.
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Okay let's look at your past accomplishments you've done hungover... Sat great score, academic decathlon, state for track. I think you are solid to go out tonight
It was like we had a conversation with our eyes.
Was it a good conversation?
It was an awkward, sexual conversation.
I'm seeing how far I can grow my leg hair out before Jason will say anything. I'm up to an inch
there is puke in my bra ... again
That Spanish guy who looks like Ben Affleck from that club we went to 3 weeks ago is still texting me.. He clearly doesn't remember what I look like.
I’m at the Eye doc, sitting in the waiting room. The woman next to me is highlighting passages in her bible. I’m watching pornhub on mute. I clearly need some penis, or Jesus.
Chasing shots with airborne.. Gonna get rid of my sickness and my soberness.
Randomize
