i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
My boyfriend texted me as I was texting some random hookup from last night. His text: "Morning baby" My response: "Your cum is in my hair"
you're just mad because in the hogwarts world I'm Harry and you're Ron. get over it.
I woke up to blood crusted on my face. I don't understand
team rage. no explanation necessary
The puppy is a lightweight. 3 beers and he's passed out on the floor already. I repeat, the puppy is a lightweight.
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
Sorry I pulled the thermostat off the wall..
Listen. I'm a changed woman. I have no problem using him for sex.
Just got back from fathers day breakfast. So hungover i couldn't eat so i just slipped my food in my pockets and threw it out while i puked in the bathroom.
If it snows I'm just gonna sit at my house in my costume and drink beer by myself all night.
Every time I roll over in bed I land on a different vibrator. I feel I'm the only one with this problem.
I told my mom about how you got white girl wasted and sobbed about Whitney Houston. She sends her condolences.
tell her thanks so much
i had an epiphany while laying on the driveway for 5 hours yesterday.
i realized i waste a lot of time
Taking body shots off hot Camren. Get here now.
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
Randomize
