My dad hugged me and said I love u. I'm glad I didn't pull out that night.
that girl looks like she smells like hot dog water...
Hooked up with my old baby sitter last night, so what do I do? As I was sucking her tits I decided it would be a good idea to say " goo goo gah gah"....it wasn't a good idea.
i either just walked in on pete wacking off to webmd or he was checking his dick for herpes
I can hear my fat mexican neighbor yelling "do you like that!" ...I hope its not his dog
theres 5 guys on the side of the road with beads and their shirts off screaming at cars already.
I may or may not have just hot boxed a backhoe on the construction site of a police station that's being rebuilt..
are we fucking for lunch or am I using my vibrator ?
At tuba camp, the pickings are slim. It's like being the tallest midget.
Where's Taylor bro?
Never mind found him under the sink
Drunkenly tried to auction off Merik's pancakes at Ihop. Apparently I make a great auctioneer. Also, no one wants 30 cent pancakes.
Sending dick pics while driving a car going 80 in the rain at night to a married woman? Why hello 2014
it was her dad's 50th birthday kegger. Within the first 5 minutes I got punched in the ear from an off-duty cop and smoked a joint the size of my vibrator.
oh yeah, and she got boxed-out by said cop. Then her dad turned around and high-fived him for it
I feel like any time there's that much rope, lingerie, and horse masks on the ground, it's safe to say it was a great night
My friends said as soon as you walked in, I motor boated you like there was no tomorrow.
Yeah, I liked it.
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