What happened to our ballroom dancing plans
Apparently I called 911 everytime Sean Kingston told me to
I just woke up with the words DO IT on my hand and six beers in my purse.
Just because i have a masturbation problem doesnt mean you can put 20 photos of Jesus in my room.
My therapist told me it was ok for me to "take risks" now. Cue the hookers and blow.
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
dude they had a "sorry for partying" wall in their house which consisted if all the hospital bills, tickets, detox receipts and court orders they've gotten. The ENTIRE wall was covered.
i just thought that perhaps i was done with the "boning on someone else's futon" stage of my life. guess not.
Yeah I made some freshmen feed me oddles of noodles and I passed out
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
we drunk the bar out of liquor so the guy was selling us bottles of wine for $2a each. Only good thing to come outta this flood
This guy on the tube is sooooooo high. Eyes are bloodshot and he's licking his headphone cords.
Just don't let me get too drunk. At one point I pulled out my dick and pissed at that party. Like on the wall.
Dude, who WASN'T thinking of motorboating her?
He drank an entire six pack, past out on the guest bed, woke up around 4AM, lifted & dropped my leg, then peed on the corner of the bed. When I told him where he was pissing he said "it's all the same babe."
Randomize