ally, we are sitting by a fire and you are totally hot. no pun intended
honestly, magaritas are the void men can't fill.
I feel like I'm in a bed a bagels and mistakes.
I just got a msg from someone saved in my phone as "gouiys stAndingg nezxt me not oz". Omh my life.
I kept calling him escargot instead of Estaban..I don't think that was the wisest choice.
Whoever owns the butter that i always steal out of the office fridge definitely put THC butter in there this time. Shit just got real.
He told me he deactivated his facebook because his girlfriend caught him wackin it to my profile picture.
10 points to you
I had to help him get his zipper down in front of his dad so he could pee in the bushes. That Is what moonshine does to you.
He says I vaguely mumbled happy New year, kissed him, threw up and then went back to sleep.
You only have to pretend to care about soccer until July. HE'S PRETTY DONT RUIN THIS.
We were covered in sweat and glitter, making out onstage, in front of everyone. I think it was a good night.
So unofficially, he told me he deleted tinder because of me. I think that's a pretty romantic gesture in 2018.
Woke up this morning to him making out with me in his sleep, then I had to go on a scavenger hunt to find a used condom before my roommate got back... it was under my pillow.
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
i had sex with a girl named after a fruit last night and it was the best thing to happen to me in 2020
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