just watched her puke in her purse and put it back on the bar. then half hour later put her hand in her bag to get a pen to give me her number. I bet she is game for anything
just had a dream there were parent teacher conferences in college...scariest dream ever.
better question... why wasnt i wearing a cape the previous 20 years of my life???
Sometimes I wish I could peel his face off and use it to take all the money out of his account.
I went to check the drunk texts i sent last night but my phone deleted them already. Even my phone is ashamed.
No. I remember how loud you used to get. Trust me.
how do you play pong handcuffed?
I'll come hang out with you guys later, but right now my parents aren't home and I have to take full advantage of being able to watch porn on full blast.
If I shaved my pubic hair into a heart for valentine's day how much would you judge me?
Your shirt... Was in my pants
I would ride that face into the sunset
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
The coast is clear - also, would it bother you if I chose not to wear pants?
Officially not baby mama #3. Celebration is in order.
So he called his lawyer from the bar to confirm the cost of hitting the douchebag before flooring him. I respect his planning skills.
Randomize