are you wasted or are you getting laid?
ebdebdebdebd
wow
we should start having sex in the shower. less clean up.
We had to be out of the dorms at 730. Meeting started at 8. I woke up at 948. Drunk and covered in glitter.
So I had a Liz Lemon moment today....went to Chipotle to get my "cheer me up" burrito bowl for the 4th time this week and the chipotle guy sighed and said always the same huh?
woke up naked, gf gone. There is a cup of change in the fridge, a bird in the bathroom, and odie is drawn on my ceiling. I live in a non sequitur
Stop trying to talk to my friends!!
then get some ugly ones...
I just won't go as hard tonight. Four dollar ladies night drink or drown is not a good idea for me. I like to get my money's worth.
What can I say, your life is charmed. I'm on the couch trying to decide whether or not to puke again.
I don't know what's happening. Everyone is wearing beaks.
Im tired as fuck but i cant leave him here like this i gave him the acid and i feel the responsibillity to put his mind back together its fun im an architect about to about to construct a whole new belief and moral system inside this soul. Talk about the best psychothearpy
you said candy land and then passed out.
ps. we found your stash in the candyland game. Thanks.
dude, we need a reunion soon, my vagina needs a deep massage. The kitty is ready to play
never planned on seeing last weekend's one night stand again, much less be on the same plane as him..
my roommate had drunk sex above me in our bunk bed and then built me a fort to apologize the next day
Which one have i been cheating ON and which one have i been cheating WITH if i met them the same night & have been dividing time equally?
Randomize
