a man that wears gold spandex underwear and party boys other people is a man after my own heart.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
it's a gatorade, cheez its, and regret kind of morning....
you know you have a brother who cares when he hands you a piece of pizza before you pass out from too many bong hits
we're like Indians of the 21st century. trading not for food and survival but personal gain and by trouble you mean getting daytime drunk and going to the roller ring then yes.
You kept mumbling that you could become one with the carpet as you proceeded to give yourself the worst carpet burn I have ever seen
I woke up this morning with a tampon in my nose and food EVERYWHERE...
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
All this studying of HIV makes me want to have sex with you.
He then used a box cutter I keep in my car to open the plan b. Who says chivalry is dead?
My trash can is full of used condoms and girl scout cookie boxes.
had more orgasms than hours of sleep last night
you drug him to get him horny then deny him sex. freaks.
As much as I hate to admit it, some day ill need a man because I can't open jars myself and you can't 69 a dildo
Like I don't even know how to respond to this?
He ate me out on the front lawn of the post office. The people in the office across the road definitely got a show!
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